so first i feel like i should say hello and goodbye to everyone i failed to say hello and goodbye to last night. i think that after a couple years of knowing most of you, and a couple months of knowing some of you, you’ve come to realize that i’m not a bitch and that i just don’t like to strike up conversations. including the maybe-conversations that might arise if i approach you to say goodbye. or at least i hope you’ve come to realize this.
so…
hello and goodbye.
last night was incredible! michael blouin, the featured poet last night, blew my mind. sometimes, writing is like music for me. i hear a lot and care for none (well, some, obviously). i start to worry that i’m not … normal (?). i hide out and don’t go to most readings and events because i’m worried someone will be like, “i wrote that” and i’ll be like, “i didn’t give a fuck then and i care even less now”. i don’t want to have to be like that so i just don’t. you’d have to really know me on a personal level to know whose writing i truly enjoy, because i don’t just go around saying “oh yeah, they’re so talented. and awesome. and talented. and etc”.
but michael blouin blew my mind. i even bought a copy of his book “chase & haven”. i don’t exactly have money and i hate going to the ATM even when i do have money (connecting, processing, do you want your receipt — too intense, thanks though). but i went to the ATM and took out some cash to buy that damn book. it reminded me of being 15 and buying CDs at shows after the sets. but this was better than that.
he is easily a new favourite … of all time. i almost don’t understand it because it happens so rarely. and i’m mostly impressed that this could have happened at an in/words reading. in/words readings need to keep happening, people need to keep showing up. even when they have to bring a dollar. no one really wants to give up on it. i know i don’t — any of it. the lingering sense of magic. the poetry hangover that doesn’t come around often enough. the feeling that almost shouldn’t come from listening, but somehow does. something i don’t usually get, a glimpse into my future, reminding me that bean salads will, in all likelihood, forever be associated with the most (honestly) talented people i’ve ever met.
:)
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